Every couple argues. It usually starts with a normal, peaceful conversation, which at some point strays into topics they disagree on. Then each side will bring ideas to defend their perspective, going back and forth until finally they agree to disagree. They’ll postpone the conversation until another time, when some new information comes to light that could decide the “winner,” and it all starts again.
However, sometimes I unintentionally say something that makes my wife very angry and she stops the conversation—a situation I don’t like because I believe it is better to address the anger, apologizing if necessary, than to stop the conversation entirely. I’d rather end the argument amicably, even if we still don’t agree.
So when a moment of peak anger like this comes into our conversation, we try to deescalate the situation. I usually tell my wife, “Darling, you don’t need to get angry.” Her answer is usually, “So stop pushing my buttons!” That phrase has always intrigued me.
As a software developer, one of my responsibilities is developing user interfaces. And of course, the way software interact with users is by… pushing buttons.
I make a living designing, programming, implementing, and training people in “pushing buttons.” I have twenty-five-year Button-Pushing Experience!
In any system I develop, it is my responsibility to determine each button’s functionality, so I know the circumstances in which a button should or should not be pushed. It is also my responsibility to design screen interfaces in the best way possible, so the user can clearly see which button they should push. Once the user learns what buttons to push and when to push them, he or she will become a very happy and productive person.
But what would happen if the user discovered that every time they use the system the buttons move, or change their color and label. Or, even worse, if some buttons are invisible, ready to delete something when pushed. I would have a long line of angry customers outside my office!
Now, in the same way, imagine that every time you open your iPhone, every icon—which is a kind of button—has been moved all over the place and looks totally different. Some apps are missing, and apps you never even installed have made their way onto your screen. In your frustration, you push buttons just trying to make sense of it. On one of these attempts you push a button that causes the screen to go black, and the iPhone breaks completely.
You bring it to the Apple Store and explain that the iPhone just stopped working after you push something. The Apple Genius examines the iPhone, looks at you, his face turns red, and he angrily shouts, “So stop pushing the wrong buttons!”
And you wake up and realize you’re actually just having an argument with your wife.
Copyright© Italo Osorio 2019